not just the lottery, but the BIG BIG Lottery:
THE-BIG-BIG Lotto Team
show details 2:06 PM (2 hours ago)
Attn:
We the members of the THE-BIG-BIG Lottery Board are pleased to inform you of the results from our just concluded lottery draws. The online cyber lotto draws was conducted from an exclusive list of 2,000,000 email addresses comprising of individuals and corporate bodies picked by an advanced automated random computer search from the internet, no tickets were sold. After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address attached to Winning ticket number 00002765649541 with Serial number BIG-3673050706-07 and lucky numbers (46)0023/4440/20/89 emerged as a winner of £500,000.00 GBP(Five hundred thousand british pounds).
To get your above stated prize, you ar e advised to contact our processing agent immediately via email with your winning information stated below and personal datas requested below;
Mr Mr Benham Cole ,
Email: mr.benhamcole01@windowslive.com
Sincerely,
Mr. Annette Byrne
how much is £500,000.00 in US dollars anyway?
UK£ 500 000.00 = $813,550 U.S. dollars
woot! i better email them straight away!!
Sunday, September 20, 2009
seattle-bound
after the events of the last week, i have made the decision to move to Seattle. anyone who really knows me would know that i've said for many, many years that i want to live in Seattle, or the surrounding area.
i believe now that this little side adventure in california was supposed to be the catapult for me to make that move.
i spent the morning job hunting (sent 15 resumes) and apartment hunting. rents are not unlike california but i found a few apartment buildings that are very nice and have decent rents ($800 - $900). my goal will be to job search every day until i find something. i'd like to be out of here in the next few months.
seattle will fulfill all my desires; i.e., the ocean, cool rainy weather, awesome coffee, seattle grunge music. i can't think of a better place to live out my last years.
seattle ... here i come.
i believe now that this little side adventure in california was supposed to be the catapult for me to make that move.
i spent the morning job hunting (sent 15 resumes) and apartment hunting. rents are not unlike california but i found a few apartment buildings that are very nice and have decent rents ($800 - $900). my goal will be to job search every day until i find something. i'd like to be out of here in the next few months.
seattle will fulfill all my desires; i.e., the ocean, cool rainy weather, awesome coffee, seattle grunge music. i can't think of a better place to live out my last years.
seattle ... here i come.
Aquarius
You may have a hard time maintaining a comfortable level of emotional detachment today if you acknowledge how much you like someone. You want to share your feelings, but could be afraid of exposing your vulnerability as you worry about being rejected. Your approach-avoidance dilemma raises long-standing relationships issues. Be patient; you won't receive answers to all your questions right away.
[??????? wow]
Ox
Refrain from building up utopian plans; keep your feet on earth and overestimate neither your strength nor that of others. Friendship will prove vital in the achievement of your projects. Affective questions will take on such importance that they may interfere with your work. Fulfill your mind and your heart with the thoughts and dreams which you haven't had time until now to explore, but without sinking into morbid introspection. A financial problem may perturb you somewhat.
see what i mean about these being right on target? spooky. but in a good way, you know?
i don't like the fact that things keep pointing to the fact that i need to get over the "in love" part and continue to accept the friendship.
after giving things a lot of thought, i have decided that i'm going to try and move to seattle. i will start job hunting / apartment hunting and see what's out there. unemployment is at 13% here in california. it was not a smart move to come here at all ~ except i had no money and no where to go. i honestly would have been homeless. it's too hot here for me ~ well in the Valley anyway ~ and i just am miserable on all levels. i talked with a stranger yesterday who said she moved from Seattle and hated it here in LA. she said the people were so rude and selfish (YES!!!) and that in Seattle everyone is always so nice, caring, easy going, etc. it would fulfill me on all levels ~ being near the ocean, cool weather and lots of rain and decent people.
now is just getting things in motion. it may take me a few months, but i'm going for it.
You may have a hard time maintaining a comfortable level of emotional detachment today if you acknowledge how much you like someone. You want to share your feelings, but could be afraid of exposing your vulnerability as you worry about being rejected. Your approach-avoidance dilemma raises long-standing relationships issues. Be patient; you won't receive answers to all your questions right away.
[??????? wow]
Ox
Refrain from building up utopian plans; keep your feet on earth and overestimate neither your strength nor that of others. Friendship will prove vital in the achievement of your projects. Affective questions will take on such importance that they may interfere with your work. Fulfill your mind and your heart with the thoughts and dreams which you haven't had time until now to explore, but without sinking into morbid introspection. A financial problem may perturb you somewhat.
see what i mean about these being right on target? spooky. but in a good way, you know?
i don't like the fact that things keep pointing to the fact that i need to get over the "in love" part and continue to accept the friendship.
after giving things a lot of thought, i have decided that i'm going to try and move to seattle. i will start job hunting / apartment hunting and see what's out there. unemployment is at 13% here in california. it was not a smart move to come here at all ~ except i had no money and no where to go. i honestly would have been homeless. it's too hot here for me ~ well in the Valley anyway ~ and i just am miserable on all levels. i talked with a stranger yesterday who said she moved from Seattle and hated it here in LA. she said the people were so rude and selfish (YES!!!) and that in Seattle everyone is always so nice, caring, easy going, etc. it would fulfill me on all levels ~ being near the ocean, cool weather and lots of rain and decent people.
now is just getting things in motion. it may take me a few months, but i'm going for it.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
stuff i deal with
i have two towels that i brought with me from colorado. one is for my hair (when i take a shower) the other is for my body. i hang them in the bathroom on the same towel bar since the day i got here. everyone in this house knows they are my towels.
yesterday when i went to take a shower, i noticed the towel i use for my hair, was gone. i was thinking, WTF? who used my towel? (they never do their laundry so their towels are always used and gross.)
i sent john a text yesterday morning asking him to ask the boys who used my towel.
i find out when i get home that kiko used it. i though, hmmm. ok. he took a shower and didn't have a towel. whatever. (to me using someone's towel is like borrowing their underwear. just not cool.) i asked for it because i wanted to wash it with my laundry.
this morning when i went out to do my laundry, my towel was on the washer. it was black. dirty. stained. obviously not used for someone's shower.
yes, i found out they used it to clean the bathroom floor around the toilet .. that hasn't been cleaned since i got here. you are talking two months of guys missing the toilet and pissing on the floor.
who the hell would do that? really? who would take someone's bath towel and use it to clean up piss on the floor?
john, of course, defends them. "maybe they thought it was a community towel." really?! (bullshit...they know they were my towels). but regardless .. how are you going to use someone's - anyone's - bath towel to clean the freaking floor????
argghhh!
yesterday when i went to take a shower, i noticed the towel i use for my hair, was gone. i was thinking, WTF? who used my towel? (they never do their laundry so their towels are always used and gross.)
i sent john a text yesterday morning asking him to ask the boys who used my towel.
i find out when i get home that kiko used it. i though, hmmm. ok. he took a shower and didn't have a towel. whatever. (to me using someone's towel is like borrowing their underwear. just not cool.) i asked for it because i wanted to wash it with my laundry.
this morning when i went out to do my laundry, my towel was on the washer. it was black. dirty. stained. obviously not used for someone's shower.
yes, i found out they used it to clean the bathroom floor around the toilet .. that hasn't been cleaned since i got here. you are talking two months of guys missing the toilet and pissing on the floor.
who the hell would do that? really? who would take someone's bath towel and use it to clean up piss on the floor?
john, of course, defends them. "maybe they thought it was a community towel." really?! (bullshit...they know they were my towels). but regardless .. how are you going to use someone's - anyone's - bath towel to clean the freaking floor????
argghhh!
hopes and dreams
Chinese horoscope:
Ox
You'll always want to go farther and no obstacle can impede your progress; however, don't let yourself be intoxicated. Possible stomach burns, flatulence: you should take more time to eat, masticating your food well. All risk of irritation or conflictual situation should be carefully avoided. Love and understanding will prevail this time. You'll even find reasons for appreciating those who annoyed you before.
Astrological horoscope:
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
The airy Libra Moon this weekend can raise your hopes about what's ahead. Perhaps you are looking forward to taking a trip. Or maybe you are eager to begin a new course of study. No matter what you are planning, this is your time to open your mind and expand your horizons. Don't be lazy; your future is not about reinforcing the status quo. Push your boundaries and see where destiny takes you.
interestingly enough i have been hearing this exact thing from john for the last two days.
everything finally came to a head wednesday night. for the first time i was honest about my feelings and what has been going on with me. why i'm frustrated most of the time and moody; taking *things* out on others.
i am still in love with him.
i guess you have to be a special kind of person to be friends with an ex. i have had a few friendships with ex boyfriends, but they were always at a distance; i.e. like it was with him the last few years over the phone. i thought i was grown up enough to put my feelings aside and accept the gift he was offering ~ a fresh start on a new life.
i am not.
this is part of an email i sent to him:
bottom line for me is i don't know how to stop being in love with you. i wasn't able to do it in the last 6 years; definitely harder now that i'm living in your space. hard to be *thisclose* to the love of your life and yet light years apart. hard to be near you when i just want to reach out and hug you and i know i can't. hard to keep the sound of my heart pounding quiet when you smile at me.
most of my bad mood has to do with being jealous of all the people around you, being hurt when you said something that crushed me or my spirit of hope, hearing you laugh when i wasn't part of making it happen.
i do understand your intention was pure ~ to help me out of a bad situation and also to come together to help one another. we both knew, however, how i felt before i even got here. i thought i could do it. i thought i could put aside my feelings and be thankful for the gift. it's apparent that i can't.
i'm just completely broken and not sure what to do. i still think it's best for everyone in the house if i leave. it might be the middle of october or closer to the end. i will stay to pay the next big elec/water bill which is Oct 15. since i "created" the better part of that bill, i am responsible for it. after that i will have to save and put my money together to get a place.
and then figure out after that how to live without you.
when i got home last night he made me talk to him. i don't even really want to. all he tells me is i need to get over it and embrace what he's offering so i can be successful in the future. so i can move forward in my life. basically what my horoscopes say.
i am not sure where to go from here. i want to get get through the next month and leave. then heal and get on my feet. do it by myself. and purge him from my life. i can't be friends with him. it's just too painful.
Ox
You'll always want to go farther and no obstacle can impede your progress; however, don't let yourself be intoxicated. Possible stomach burns, flatulence: you should take more time to eat, masticating your food well. All risk of irritation or conflictual situation should be carefully avoided. Love and understanding will prevail this time. You'll even find reasons for appreciating those who annoyed you before.
Astrological horoscope:
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
The airy Libra Moon this weekend can raise your hopes about what's ahead. Perhaps you are looking forward to taking a trip. Or maybe you are eager to begin a new course of study. No matter what you are planning, this is your time to open your mind and expand your horizons. Don't be lazy; your future is not about reinforcing the status quo. Push your boundaries and see where destiny takes you.
interestingly enough i have been hearing this exact thing from john for the last two days.
everything finally came to a head wednesday night. for the first time i was honest about my feelings and what has been going on with me. why i'm frustrated most of the time and moody; taking *things* out on others.
i am still in love with him.
i guess you have to be a special kind of person to be friends with an ex. i have had a few friendships with ex boyfriends, but they were always at a distance; i.e. like it was with him the last few years over the phone. i thought i was grown up enough to put my feelings aside and accept the gift he was offering ~ a fresh start on a new life.
i am not.
this is part of an email i sent to him:
bottom line for me is i don't know how to stop being in love with you. i wasn't able to do it in the last 6 years; definitely harder now that i'm living in your space. hard to be *thisclose* to the love of your life and yet light years apart. hard to be near you when i just want to reach out and hug you and i know i can't. hard to keep the sound of my heart pounding quiet when you smile at me.
most of my bad mood has to do with being jealous of all the people around you, being hurt when you said something that crushed me or my spirit of hope, hearing you laugh when i wasn't part of making it happen.
i do understand your intention was pure ~ to help me out of a bad situation and also to come together to help one another. we both knew, however, how i felt before i even got here. i thought i could do it. i thought i could put aside my feelings and be thankful for the gift. it's apparent that i can't.
i'm just completely broken and not sure what to do. i still think it's best for everyone in the house if i leave. it might be the middle of october or closer to the end. i will stay to pay the next big elec/water bill which is Oct 15. since i "created" the better part of that bill, i am responsible for it. after that i will have to save and put my money together to get a place.
and then figure out after that how to live without you.
when i got home last night he made me talk to him. i don't even really want to. all he tells me is i need to get over it and embrace what he's offering so i can be successful in the future. so i can move forward in my life. basically what my horoscopes say.
i am not sure where to go from here. i want to get get through the next month and leave. then heal and get on my feet. do it by myself. and purge him from my life. i can't be friends with him. it's just too painful.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
coolness
You are 47 years and 230 days old
You were born on Tuesday
on a cold winter's day
You were born: 17397 days ago
You were born: 572 months ago
You were born: 2485 weeks ago
Your next birthday is in: 135 days
Your Chinese zodiac sign: Ox
Your zodiac sign : Aquarius
Your element : Air
Your planet: Saturn and Uranus
Your colour: Midnight blue
Your stone: Amethyst
my past life:
Diagnosis: I do not know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.
You were born somewhere around territory of modern Austria approximately on 975.
Your profession was entertainer, musician, poet, temple-dancer.
Your brief psychological profile in that past life: You always liked to travel, to investigate, could have been detective or spy.
Lesson, that your last past life brought to present: Your lesson -- to conquer jealousy and anger in yourself and then in those, who will select you as their guide. You should understand that these weaknesses are caused by fear and self-regret.
(my favorite colors are midnight (cobalt) blue, purple (amethyst) and black. i have always said i wanted to visit Vienna, Austria. i would love to be an entertainer or musician ~ um not feeling the temple dancer thing. i am an investigator of all things ~ i have been called a detective many times. now, the answer i asked in my last post about what i did in a past life ~ i got my answer. i was a man. no wonder.)
You were born on Tuesday
on a cold winter's day
You were born: 17397 days ago
You were born: 572 months ago
You were born: 2485 weeks ago
Your next birthday is in: 135 days
Your Chinese zodiac sign: Ox
Your zodiac sign : Aquarius
Your element : Air
Your planet: Saturn and Uranus
Your colour: Midnight blue
Your stone: Amethyst
my past life:
Diagnosis: I do not know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.
You were born somewhere around territory of modern Austria approximately on 975.
Your profession was entertainer, musician, poet, temple-dancer.
Your brief psychological profile in that past life: You always liked to travel, to investigate, could have been detective or spy.
Lesson, that your last past life brought to present: Your lesson -- to conquer jealousy and anger in yourself and then in those, who will select you as their guide. You should understand that these weaknesses are caused by fear and self-regret.
(my favorite colors are midnight (cobalt) blue, purple (amethyst) and black. i have always said i wanted to visit Vienna, Austria. i would love to be an entertainer or musician ~ um not feeling the temple dancer thing. i am an investigator of all things ~ i have been called a detective many times. now, the answer i asked in my last post about what i did in a past life ~ i got my answer. i was a man. no wonder.)
right ...
Aquarius
At first it seems like others are encouraging you, but when you actually begin to put your plan into motion, they withdraw and don't show up to help. You cannot effectively go chasing after the approval you want to have today, for it recedes faster the more you pursue it. The urgency is within your mind. Ease up; you have more time than you think.
crazy, i say. just crazy.
i like reading my horoscope at the end of the day to see how accurate (NOT!) it is. amazingly enough my chinese horoscope (i'm the ox) and my zodiac horoscope have been strangely on target. today has to do with asking for piano lessons, going through a lesson, being strongly encouraged and praised, to having that encouragement snatched away like a lion stealing dinner from a lesser animal.
why do i think when he's being nice, that it will last? how many times do i have to have my heart stomped on before i realize that he's simply a control freak and is nice when i'm submissive to him, but a complete ass when i try to stand up for myself? i KNOW this. yet i continue to let him play me like a grand piano. (pun intended)
i'm sick of the roller coaster. he would tell you it's me. the problem is me. i'm the one with mood swings. and that is partially true. he never wants to be accountable for the situations he gives me to deal with. he loves to claim innocence in all things; that he's just "keepin it real." yea, whatever.
his best friend looked up (stalked) a former girlfriend from 20 years ago. it's a negative situation as far as i'm concerned - his wife and her husband do not know that they have been getting together for lunch once a week. (for the record i think that is fucked up.) but all of the sudden he (my *roommate*) has been having ex girlfriends over for dinner and last night he went to spend the evening with yet another one. WTH? i mean, we should all have a bbq. him and all his ex girlfriends. it's insane. it's like they are going through some stupid mid-life crisis and looking to relive the past. of course all his ex girlfriends have "beautiful souls" .. except me that is. i guess i'm just fat hag nag. at least that's what i hear.
this whole adventure was supposed to be the beginning of a new life, right? happiness. joy. contentment. well what the hell happened? because i'm not having very much fun right now.
At first it seems like others are encouraging you, but when you actually begin to put your plan into motion, they withdraw and don't show up to help. You cannot effectively go chasing after the approval you want to have today, for it recedes faster the more you pursue it. The urgency is within your mind. Ease up; you have more time than you think.
crazy, i say. just crazy.
i like reading my horoscope at the end of the day to see how accurate (NOT!) it is. amazingly enough my chinese horoscope (i'm the ox) and my zodiac horoscope have been strangely on target. today has to do with asking for piano lessons, going through a lesson, being strongly encouraged and praised, to having that encouragement snatched away like a lion stealing dinner from a lesser animal.
why do i think when he's being nice, that it will last? how many times do i have to have my heart stomped on before i realize that he's simply a control freak and is nice when i'm submissive to him, but a complete ass when i try to stand up for myself? i KNOW this. yet i continue to let him play me like a grand piano. (pun intended)
i'm sick of the roller coaster. he would tell you it's me. the problem is me. i'm the one with mood swings. and that is partially true. he never wants to be accountable for the situations he gives me to deal with. he loves to claim innocence in all things; that he's just "keepin it real." yea, whatever.
his best friend looked up (stalked) a former girlfriend from 20 years ago. it's a negative situation as far as i'm concerned - his wife and her husband do not know that they have been getting together for lunch once a week. (for the record i think that is fucked up.) but all of the sudden he (my *roommate*) has been having ex girlfriends over for dinner and last night he went to spend the evening with yet another one. WTH? i mean, we should all have a bbq. him and all his ex girlfriends. it's insane. it's like they are going through some stupid mid-life crisis and looking to relive the past. of course all his ex girlfriends have "beautiful souls" .. except me that is. i guess i'm just fat hag nag. at least that's what i hear.
this whole adventure was supposed to be the beginning of a new life, right? happiness. joy. contentment. well what the hell happened? because i'm not having very much fun right now.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
dysfunctional?
Saturday, September 12
You will be speaking out on an important issue, most likely because of a "dysfunctional relationship" in your circle of friends. Whether you are intimately involved or not, you will have strong opinions and should tread carefully if you want to be heard.
lol! 'nuff said.
You will be speaking out on an important issue, most likely because of a "dysfunctional relationship" in your circle of friends. Whether you are intimately involved or not, you will have strong opinions and should tread carefully if you want to be heard.
lol! 'nuff said.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
pain
Tuesday, September 8
Dramatic changes are coming in your love life as a result of changing values, changes in friendships, or changes in your beliefs about "right and wrong". You may be growing toward a better understanding, or are growing apart from someone who has chosen to stay frozen in the past.
that couldn't be more on target. i just read it.
when i got home tonight, there was another car in the driveway. i pulled in behind it.
when i came in, i saw a woman sitting very close to john on the couch. he introduced her to me as "rachel." from what i remember, this person and he were friends when he and i were together in the past. several times when he would call me on the phone she would come over. they are also "exs".
she is also obviously very close to john's son. as i write this they are all sitting in the living room, laughing, playing, joking and having a great time. they ordered pizza. they did *kind of* invite me. as in "um, did you want any of this?"
no. no thanks.
i'll take my heart break with my diet pepsi in my room.
Dramatic changes are coming in your love life as a result of changing values, changes in friendships, or changes in your beliefs about "right and wrong". You may be growing toward a better understanding, or are growing apart from someone who has chosen to stay frozen in the past.
that couldn't be more on target. i just read it.
when i got home tonight, there was another car in the driveway. i pulled in behind it.
when i came in, i saw a woman sitting very close to john on the couch. he introduced her to me as "rachel." from what i remember, this person and he were friends when he and i were together in the past. several times when he would call me on the phone she would come over. they are also "exs".
she is also obviously very close to john's son. as i write this they are all sitting in the living room, laughing, playing, joking and having a great time. they ordered pizza. they did *kind of* invite me. as in "um, did you want any of this?"
no. no thanks.
i'll take my heart break with my diet pepsi in my room.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
ok .. waiting
Sunday, September 6
You may have one of those silly misunderstandings that makes you wonder if your life is not becoming some weird kind of reality show or situation comedy being secretly filmed for network television. Not to worry, your loved ones will start acting normal again soon.
(chinese horoscope)
i'm waiting.
You may have one of those silly misunderstandings that makes you wonder if your life is not becoming some weird kind of reality show or situation comedy being secretly filmed for network television. Not to worry, your loved ones will start acting normal again soon.
(chinese horoscope)
i'm waiting.
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