i haven't had much to post about the last couple of days.
i haven't had an interaction that would strive to be the subject of a love note. i haven't read anything that really prompted me to feel uplifted about.
i think my approaching birthday is the issue. i'm thinking about skeet 1,000 time a day as it was my last birthday in 2018 that he called me after 35 years. and while he didn't text me at all on Thanksgiving, Christmas or New Years, i am sick to my stomach that he won't acknowledge that he started this up again 350 some days ago and then left me, again.
the anxiety is killing me despite my trying to occupy my mind elsewhere.
i guess it's hurting so much because i know he's not going to contact and that will be the final confirmation that this person i have loved for 38 years, will never contact me again.
i haven't had an interaction that would strive to be the subject of a love note. i haven't read anything that really prompted me to feel uplifted about.
i think my approaching birthday is the issue. i'm thinking about skeet 1,000 time a day as it was my last birthday in 2018 that he called me after 35 years. and while he didn't text me at all on Thanksgiving, Christmas or New Years, i am sick to my stomach that he won't acknowledge that he started this up again 350 some days ago and then left me, again.
the anxiety is killing me despite my trying to occupy my mind elsewhere.
i guess it's hurting so much because i know he's not going to contact and that will be the final confirmation that this person i have loved for 38 years, will never contact me again.
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